God

Ultimate Worth

Barbara Kain Parker Biblical Insights, Inspirational, Personal Testimony, Promotion , , , , , , ,

IMG_1422Out of curiosity, I googled self esteem, and in 0.38 seconds had 46,000,000 results. More articles, books, conferences, classes, and multi-media presentations advising us how to build positive esteem in ourselves and our children than one person could ever digest. I skimmed through the offerings of the first 10 pages of hits, and not one of them was biblically based, so I’d like to recommend an alternative and recommend the best book I’ve ever read about building self esteem from God’s perspective, Ultimate Worth, by my friend Russ Llewellyn, an amazing Christian who is also a clinical psychologist. In his words…

“God allows but one path to permanent worth: love through humility. We build our self-esteem only on the things which God values. We recognize that apart from God, any esteem we give ourselves will crumble and scatter like dust swept away by the winds of time.

Our ultimate worth, our self-esteem, comes through humility. In humility, we learn to receive all of our personal worth from God. We learn to love and worship God, as well as love and respect ourselves and others the way God does.

God made you out of spirit, the same essence as He is. He made you for a noble purpose, to be and live on earth as sons and daughters of the Most High. You have a birthright, a kingly inheritance from God alone—ultimate worth.”

Russ can be contacted for further information and/or to place an order at DrRussLlewellyn@aol.com

 

 

 

 

 

He Is My Destiny

Barbara Kain Parker Devotional, Inspirational, Personal Testimony , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

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Waiting to meet a friend for lunch, I enjoyed a blast from the past; all the way back to about 1960, as Vince Gill’s voice crooned throughout the restaurant, “I’ve been cheated, been mistreated.  When will I be loved?  I’ve been put down, I’ve been pushed ’round.  When will I be loved?”

In those days I was just a child, glued to a black and white TV screen as the Everly Brothers performed their big hit on American Bandstand.  How could I know the sad truth that echoes behind those lyrics?  The sad truth that has probably been one reason the song has endured over the years; recorded and/or performed not only by Vince Gill, but also by Linda Ronstadt and a host of other artists.  The sad truth that life is hard had not yet become a reality to me.  Little did I know that I would soon grow to understand all too well the feeling of being cheated or mistreated; a feeling with which almost everyone can relate.  How could I know that the burning question in the broken hearts of mankind is indeed, “When will I be loved?”

King David certainly understood such pain. In Psalm 55 he moaned…

My heart is in anguish within me; the terrors of death have fallen upon me.

Fear and trembling come upon me, and horror overwhelms me…

For it is not an enemy who taunts me—then I could bear it; 
it is not an adversary who deals insolently with me—then I could hide from him.

But it is you, a man, my equal, my companion, my familiar friend.

Pondering the significance of the song while driving home from lunch, I was talking to the Lord about how we usually handle such things.  Immediately I heard the lyrics of another familiar song in my spirit; “You’re looking for love in all the wrong places.”  Another sad truth!  Books could be written—and have been, I’m sure—chronicling the mistakes people have made while searching for a love to fill the void of hurt and despair that was left behind by violations of trust and broken confidences.

Once again, we can look to King David…

Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you;
he will never permit
the righteous to be moved…You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle.
 Are they not in your book?Then my enemies will turn back
 in the day when I call. This I know, that God is for me.In God, whose word I praise, in the Lord, whose word I praise,in God I trust; I shall not be afraid.  What can man do to me…For your steadfast love is great to the heavens, your faithfulness to the clouds.  Psalm 55:22, 56:8-11, 57:10

When we encounter the love of God, the same love that David experienced, we too will praise Him, and we can then sing another enduring song from the 60s…

I will follow him, follow him wherever he may go

There isn’t an ocean too deep

A mountain so high it can keep me away

I must follow him

Ever since he touched my hand I knew

That near him I always must be

And nothing can keep him from me

He is my destiny

 

I Had a Dream of the Triumphant Church

Barbara Kain Parker Biblical Insights, Inspirational , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

 

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Echoing in my mind as I awoke a few days ago were the words made famous by Martin Luther King, “I had a dream;” and for the night that had just transpired, that was one of the biggest understatements imaginable. It had been an amazing experience as one dream segment flowed into another, and then another—waking often for a brief moment, only to quickly fall back to sleep for a continuation of the sequence. When morning finally arrived I knew I needed to write as much of it down as possible, but already the scenes were quickly fading.

In a dream, in a vision of the night, When deep sleep falls upon men, While slumbering on their beds, Then He opens the ears of men, And seals their instruction. Job 33:15-16

Like a dream when one awakes, O Lord, when you rouse yourself, you despise them as phantoms. Psalm 73:20

What remained was the sure and certain knowledge that I had just witnessed the glory of the LORD being released among His people in a way that we perhaps have never seen since the first Pentecost; since that day when Jesus’ followers who had obediently waited for the coming of the Holy Spirit finally received Him.

When the day of Pentecost arrived, they were all together in one place. And suddenly there came from heaven a sound like a mighty rushing wind, and it filled the entire house where they were sitting. And divided tongues as of fire appeared to them and rested on each one of them. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit gave them utterance. Acts 2:1-4

Failing to recall all of the specifics, yet still reeling from the weighty presence of God throughout the night, I wrote the little that I could recall in my journal; and yet I knew that in one of my waking moments a familiar song had been resounding in my spirit, a song I knew I wouldn’t forget; but I did. So I asked the LORD to remind me if it was important and, to be quite honest, I didn’t really expect Him to do it. But i immediately remembered the Gaither’s incredible song, The Church Triumphant. Please, please visit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtCV_ysZC04 to listen and be blessed by the song, and join with me to rejoice that God’s Church is indeed alive and well.

In recent times, many of us have focused much attention on terrible circumstances—the terrible state of the world, the terrible state of the economy, the terrible state of our families or relationships, the terrible state of the modern-day church that has so compromised itself with the world. And indeed, the terrible truth of Romans 2:18-34 is everywhere we look.

For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth. For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things. Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen. For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature; and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error. And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done. They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips, slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless. Though they know God’s righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them.

I would now contend that it’s time for the Church to change its focus. The evil all around us is only going to increase until the Day of the Lord, but we needn’t allow that to distract us from our triumphant Jesus. As a picture is blurred when the focus is off, so is the vision of the Church; and all we need is a simple adjustment to turn our gaze upon the One who has already overcome all evil at the cross. Romans 1:16-17 remains just as relevant today as the succeeding verses that were just quoted…

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, “The righteous shall live by faith.”

Remember those faithful disciples who went into that upper room and waited for the coming of the Spirit? Many of us have much in common with them! We have been waiting for a fresh outpouring of the Holy Spirit for years and years and years. We have waited and waited, standing in faith on the promises of God. What if our wait is just about over? I absolutely believe it is!  I’ve have held onto that promise for such a long time it seems; but now, after that night of glory-filled dreams in which the church was exploding for righteousness at every turn, I’m certain that the Church, God’s Church, is very definitely alive and well; and the triumphant power of Jesus through the presence of the Holy Spirit is even now being poured out upon the world.

Let this day of Pentecost be a day that history will look back at as the turning point, as the day when the Holy Spirit began to blow anew throughout creation to revolutionize the Bride of Christ as she prepares for the arrival of her Bridegroom.

He’s Kidding…Isn’t He?

Barbara Kain Parker Devotional, Inspirational , , , , , , ,

ID-10083939    Television, Internet, newspapers—any media; take your pick, and it will be full of bad news—violence, dissention, hurricanes, fires, deception, scandals, unemployment, and more.  So, while only God himself knows exactly where we are in terms of the end times, we’re certainly far enough along for people to be overcome with negative emotions—disgust, hopelessness, anxiety, depression, worry, fear.  But, as He explained what end times would look like to the disciples, Jesus said that these things should not be frightening .

 “See that no one leads you astray. For many will come in my name, saying, ‘I am the Christ,’ and they will lead many astray.  And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not alarmed, for this must take place, but the end is not yet.  For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom, and there will be famines and earthquakes in various places.  All these are but the beginning of the birth pains.  “Then they will deliver you up to tribulation and put you to death, and you will be hated by all nations for my name’s sake.  And then many will fall away and betray one another and hate one another.  And many false prophets will arise and lead many astray.  And because lawlessness will be increased, the love of many will grow cold. (Matthew 24:4-12)

    He must have been kidding!!! Could knowledge of such a dire future be comforting?  Yes, because it comes with His promise.

But the one who endures to the end will be saved.  And this gospel of the kingdom will be proclaimed throughout the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come. (Matthew 24:13-14)

    These days it can be hard to trust others because, somewhere along the way, deception and manipulation seem to have become acceptable behavior in order to achieve a goal.  Some might ask how we can trust what Jesus said?  How do we know that He was any different than our leaders today; that He was telling the truth?  What’s His track record?  Are we really supposed to believe that we don’t need to worry?  That doesn’t seem logical, or even possible! 

    Evidence that God’s word is true is overwhelming, and many volumes have been written documenting fulfilled prophecies and promises.  So let’s narrow it down and get specific regarding His track record with people who were told not to fear.  Is there proof that He came through for them—that He kept His word?

    Abram was already 75 years old when God told him to pack up, leave his home, and go to another country; all based on His promise that, “I will make of you a great nation.”  Years passed—difficult years—years of famine, fear, family friction, battle—years in which no heir of whom a great nation would come had been born.

After these things the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision, saying, “Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your exceedingly great reward.” (Genesis 15:1)

    Even more difficult and disappointing years passed before Isaac finally came along; and Abram, renamed Abraham, was 100 years old.  Yet, through all of the trials, he steadfastly chose to believe God and to continue on in faith.

    Isaac had grown up and married when there was another famine, and God showed up to restate the promise he’d made to Abraham.

And the Lord appeared to him and said, “… I will be with you and will bless you, for to you and to your offspring I will give all these lands, and I will establish the oath that I swore to Abraham your father.  I will multiply your offspring as the stars of heaven and will give to your offspring all these lands. And in your offspring all the nations of the earth shall be blessed, because Abraham obeyed my voice and kept my charge, my commandments, my statutes, and my laws.” (Genesis 26:2-5)

And the Lord appeared to him the same night and said, “I am the God of Abraham your father. Fear not, for I am with you and will bless you and multiply your offspring for my servant Abraham’s sake.” (Genesis 26:24)

    Eventually Isaac’s son, Jacob, had his own encounter with God.

Then God spoke to Israel in the visions of the night, and said, “Jacob, Jacob!”  And he said, “Here I am.”  So He said, “I am God, the God of your father; do not fear to go down to Egypt, for I will make of you a great nation there.  I will go down with you to Egypt, and I will also surely bring you up again; and Joseph will put his hand on your eyes.” (Genesis 46:2-4)

    Fast forward to Joshua, just after Moses’ death.  Here he was, 80 years old and taking over the leadership of the Children of Israel, with years of battle ahead in order to seize the land of Canaan.  Talk about someone who could’ve been frightened!  There were giants in that land, and 40 years earlier all of the Israelites except Joshua and Caleb had been so scared that they’d refused to go forward, and ended up wandering around the desert until they all died and a younger-and-braver generation grew up.

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:8-10)

[After Joshua’s death] the Lord raised up judges, who saved them out of the hand of those who plundered them.  Yet they did not listen to their judges, for they whored after other gods and bowed down to them.  They soon turned aside from the way in which their fathers had walked, who had obeyed the commandments of the Lord, and they did not do so.  Whenever the Lord raised up judges for them, the Lord was with the judge, and he saved them from the hand of their enemies all the days of the judge.  For the Lord was moved to pity by their groaning because of those who afflicted and oppressed them. (Judges 2:16-18)

    And along came Gideon.  One day an angel showed up with the news that God was calling him to undertake the thankless task of leading this unrighteous bunch.

Then Gideon perceived that he was the angel of the Lord. And Gideon said, “Alas, O Lord God! For now I have seen the angel of the Lord face to face.”  But the Lord said to him, “Peace be to you. Do not fear; you shall not die.” (Judges 6:22-23)

    And how about some prophets?  Jeremiah and Ezekiel were both commissioned by God to warn His hard-hearted people that they were headed for destruction—not a fun job, to say the least.

But the Lord said to me, “Do not say, ‘I am only a youth’; or to all to whom I send you, you shall go, and whatever I command you, you shall speak.  Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you to deliver you, declares the Lord.” (Jeremiah 1:7-9)

And you, son of man, be not afraid of them, nor be afraid of their words, though briers and thorns are with you and you sit on scorpions. Be not afraid of their words, nor be dismayed at their looks, for they are a rebellious house. (Ezekiel 2:6)

    Abraham, Isaac and Jacob; Joshua; Gideon; Jeremiah and Ezekiel; all were told by God to not be afraid in the face of tremendous trials.  Oh, but they were Bible heroes—they were special—right?  No, they were ordinary men, and the only thing that made them that made them any different than others is that they made a choice to believe that God’s would be faithful to His promises.  They all chose faith over fear.  They all understood the truth of words that had not yet even been written by Paul the Apostle…

… we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. (Romans 5: 3-5)

    Still, they lived so long ago in Old Testament times—surely it’s different now.  No, not unless we choose to ignore Jesus, who repeatedly encouraged His followers, “Why are you so afraid?”  “Take courage.”  “Don’t be afraid.”  “Why did you doubt, you of little faith?”   “Do you still have no faith?  It is I—don’t be afraid.”

    So here we are, living in difficult, disheartening and even frightening times; and like those Old Testament believers, we have a choice.  We can choose to dwell in the mire of fear, or we can exercise our faith in God, for He can be trusted to keep His promises.

But the Lord is faithful. He will establish you and guard you against the evil one. (2 Thessalonians 3:3)

Can God Be Trusted?

Barbara Kain Parker Devotional, Inspirational , , , , , , , , , , ,

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The Interstate 5 corridor through California’s Central Valley can seem interminable, especially if one is driving alone.  So, to break up the monotony on this trip, I grabbed several old CDs that I haven’t listened to in years.

Cruising along to Carole King’s “Tapestry” album, the Lord was speaking as loudly as she was singing.  “I feel the earth move under my feet; I feel the sky tumbling down, tumbling down; I feel my heart start to trembling whenever you’re around…” and I considered the earth-quaking impact of being in the presence of God.

Then, “Way over yonder is a place that I know, where I can find shelter from a hunger and cold…Talkin’ about a, talkin’ about a, way over yonder is a place I have seen, in a garden of wisdom, from some long ago dream,” and I yearned for heavenly places.

And, self-explanatory, “Where you lead, I will follow, anywhere that you tell me to…I will follow where you lead.”

But then there was, “I’d like to know that your love is love I can be sure of; so tell me now and I won’t ask again, will you still love me tomorrow?  Will you still love me tomorrow?”  And I realized that this is the cry of many people who are afraid to trust God because they have been bitterly and continually disappointed by others.

God’s Word is true and, yes, he can be trusted!

Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you…It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.  Deuteronomy 31:6, 8

Then David said to Solomon his son, “Be strong and courageous and do it. Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed, for the Lord God, even my God, is with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”  1 Chronicles 28:20

And I will lead the blind in a way that they do not know, in paths that they have not known I will guide them.  I will turn the darkness before them into light, the rough places into level ground.  These are the things I do, and I do not forsake them.  Isaiah 42:16

…for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”  So we can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?”  Hebrews 13:5b-6

How Sweet It Can Be

Barbara Kain Parker Devotional, Inspirational , , , ,

 

Two pies from which to choose—coconut cream and lemon meringue—so it’s a good thing the dinner had been spectacular because eight out of ten people wanted lemon, and the slices were small.  Isn’t it amazing how delicious a lemon can taste when a little bit (or a lot!) of sugar is added in?  Lemonade, lemon-drop candies, lemon cakes/icing/fillings/bars.  Yummmmmm!!!

And even if one stays away from sugar, there’s lemon chicken, lemon juice on seafood, lemon slices in water, unsweetened lemon tea, and on and on…

Or just think of the many other uses—lemon wax, lemon scents, lemon as a hair lightener, lemons as a garbage disposal freshener or stain remover, and once again on and on…

But all by itself, as good as it may look or smell a lemon is sour.  Unless you’re one of the rare people who love them as-is, sucking a lemon will set your teeth on edge and make you cringe—almost as bad as fingernails on a chalkboard.

I’m sure we’ve all heard someone’s sage advice, “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade”—perhaps a parent trying to teach us to stop complaining and make something good out of a bad situation.  But when I hear that phrase I think of our LORD, for He’s the best lemonade maker I know.  He takes broken lives and turns them around and He brings triumph out of tragedy.  When we belong to Him, life can be sweet indeed!

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.  Romans 8:28

 

In the Morning We Flourish…

Barbara Kain Parker Devotional, Inspirational , , , , , , , ,

 

The day lilies in my yard astonish me with their beauty—their delicacy and rich colors shout to my spirit of the vibrant imagination and creativity of God.  Aptly known by the scientific name, Hemerocallis, which comes from the Greek words for “day” and “beautiful,” they bloom one morning and have wilted by the next; great illustrations of God’s truth about the brevity of life.

He comes out like a flower and withers; he flees like a shadow and continues not.  Job 14:2

O Lord, what is man who you regard him, or the son of man who you think of him?  Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow.  Psalm 144:3-4

In the morning of our lives we flourish, blossoming out to become all that God created us to be; growing from helpless infants into accomplished adults, developing careers, raising families, reaching for our dreams.

But it doesn’t last long.  Soon, a look in the mirror reminds us that youth is fading and we may become desperate to hold onto it—turning to diet, exercise and Botox to ward off the inevitable.  And yet, time marches forward, and suddenly we have become parents, then grandparents, then great-grandparents; and we wonder how it happened so fast.

As I ponder the scope of my years, God puts it in perspective for me.  My life isn’t really about the brief time that I am confined to this body—it is about preparing for the eternity I will spend with Him—this is just my warm-up for forever.  So why should I lament the trials I go through now since He has made it plain that they are meant to strengthen me?

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.  James 1:2-4

Watching the Summer Olympics, I realized that I’ve never heard an Olympian complain about the rigors of training—each one gladly pays the necessary price to compete in their games.  And so I too will persevere, remembering Paul’s words that,

Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved his appearing.  2 Timothy 4:8

Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  Hebrews 12:1-2

 

God’s Provision

Barbara Kain Parker Devotional, Inspirational , , , ,

How much easier our lives can be when we live and move and have our being in Jesus; when we relinquish ownership of our problems and allow for His provision.  This truth was once again exhibited to me in the last few weeks as my parents’ home was sold at an above-asking price to a wonderful family after multiple offers.  When the tenants of the past three years called to tell me they had to move I felt an immediate certainty that God was in control so there was no worry; just a certainty the He had a plan.  Before Dad died he told Mom that he had given that house to the LORD and he didn’t want her to ever worry about it—so she didn’t; and for three years she had the most incredible tenants who made improvements and left the house in better shape than it was when they moved in.  My dad was a man who lived his faith and the truth of Mark 7:37 and Philippians 4:11-13 were evident in his life.

And they were astonished beyond measure, saying, “He has done all things well. He even makes the deaf hear and the mute speak.” 

Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.   I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.  I can do all things through him who strengthens me. 

My prayer that the following excerpt from Richard’s Story will be a blessing to many as the testimony of my Dad’s faith lives on.

Things became difficult during the last few years of Richard’s life, especially as his vision and hearing became progressively worse and Leota had several strokes.  Having survived prostate cancer, a hernia, a detached retina in one eye and macular degeneration in the other, cataract surgery, and a pacemaker; he was now also afflicted with Alzheimer’s disease.  Additionally, he was constantly worried about Leota, who was incapacitated by multiple strokes.  Regardless, he continued working in his yard almost every day, struggling to mow, keep the weeds out of the grass, and fix the sprinklers that kept breaking.  Things that he once could do in a few minutes required hours, but he kept on keeping on.

All of Richard’s and Leota’s kids were concerned about them continuing to live alone in Apple Valley, knowing they could no longer manage, and all of them came as often as possible to spend time helping out.  Finally though, their health issues became so critical that Barbara often had to drive up from Orange County, 100 miles away, to handle an emergency of some sort.  On several occasions it was when the neighbor called to say that Leota had been taken to the hospital by ambulance and he would stay with Richard until she could get there.  As a registered nurse, Barbara had serious concerns about the quality of care both parents were receiving so, in September 2008, she finally loaded them into her car, took them home with her, and got both of them appointments with doctors she knew were competent.

Richard’s new ophthalmologist provided one of the greatest gifts he could ever have received in his final months.  Previously, some doctor had told him that his vision was steadily deteriorating and he would eventually go blind, creating a dread and a fear that plagued him constantly.  The new ophthalmologist not only did a thorough eye exam, but also performed a laser procedure that improved his vision a little, and he was frequently heard happily proclaiming, “I thought I was going to go blind, but that doctor told me ‘Mr. Kain, I assure you; you are not going to go blind.’”

During the month at Barbara’s home, a condo about a mile away was leased for Richard and Leota.  As the new home search began, Richard was adamant that he didn’t want to live in the city and there was just no way he’d ever move into one of those places.  But then a miracle occurred—by what could only have been divine intervention, Barbara was told of a place that had just become available and wasn’t even listed on the market.  As soon as Richard walked in the door his face lit up and he exclaimed, “I like this place!”  A spacious 2-bedroom/2-bath condo with two enclosed patios in a beautiful setting was the answer to many prayers, and on October 1, 2008, they moved into their new home.  Richard often expressed his gratitude to God for helping him find the perfect place for Leota to live when he was gone.

As it turned out, Richard and Leota only got to share their home for about two weeks before she had to have surgery for colon cancer and then went into a nursing home for rehabilitation.  They were thrilled when she came home in good shape, but just another couple of weeks had passed when she fell, breaking her femur and ended up back in the hospital and nursing home again.  By this time, Richard could no longer be left alone and Barbara and Ed traded off staying with him.  He was quite a challenge because the Alzheimer’s had progressed to the point that he couldn’t go out and walk (as he loved to do for hours on end) without getting lost.  It didn’t matter how often he was told not to leave the house alone, off he’d go and the search was on once again.  Additionally, he was so very worried about his “sweet, beautiful, pretty-thing, wonderful wife” that he would moan and cry all night and there was nothing they could do or say to comfort him.  One time though, when Leota confronted him about it he replied, “But I was just praying for you.”  An intercessor right up to the end!  Ed wrote: “I was able to spend a lot of time with Dad during the last 4 months of his life while Mom was in the hospital or rehab facility.  With all our time together, I came to appreciate that Dad was the real deal; what you saw and heard from Dad was what he believed.  He experienced some tough times dealing with Mom’s medical problems, but he also had a faith in God that saw him through an extremely difficult time.”

In January 2009, Barbara received a call from Ed that Dad had fallen in the shower and he was unconscious and bleeding.  The paramedics were already there by the time Barbara arrived, and off everyone went to the emergency room.  Richard had a gash in his elbow that was bleeding profusely and required a lot of stitches.  During the routine screening which included a chest x-ray, it was determined that there was a massive tumor in his chest and he was admitted to the hospital for a biopsy.  The tumor was a malignant cancer for which nothing could be done (quite a surprise as two chest x-rays taken just eight months previously had been completely normal!). By this time he could barely walk due to pain from a tumor in his foot, so he was discharged from the hospital to the same nursing home where Leota was a patient—in fact they shared the same room for about 6 weeks before he died.

God’s miraculous provision was so very evident in all of this!  Not only did Richard get to spend his last weeks with his beloved wife at his side 24 hours a day, but they were both being professionally cared for; they were served meals that he enjoyed tremendously, either in their room or in the dining room; all of it was completely paid for by Medicare so there were no financial worries; and it was party city as all of his kids and the majority of his grandkids came to visit.  He was in his element surrounded by his family.

After entering the nursing home, Richard had one final doctor’s appointment.  Barbara took him to the oncologists office to get the official results of the biopsy and to see what, if anything, could be done about it.  Before the doctor even spoke, it was evident by the look on his face that the news was not good.  He actually had tears in his eyes as he explained that there was absolutely no hope for a cure and the best that could be done was to keep Richard comfortable for the very short time he had left.  Richard responded, “That’s OK.  It only means I’m going home sooner rather than later, and I’m ready.”  The doctor didn’t quite know how to respond other than to tear up again.  What a testimony!!

What a Day That Will Be…

Barbara Kain Parker Devotional, Inspirational , , , , , , , ,

 

Unlike the wild and rugged coast of the Pacific Northwest, Southern California’s beaches are more populated than isolated.  This distinction does offer some unique advantages, not the least of which is a shore dotted with wonderful seaside restaurants where great meals are enhanced by warm sun, roaring waves, peals of laughter from kids frolicking in the surf, seagulls squawking on the beach, and pelicans soaring through the sky and diving into the water to retrieve their own dinner.

And the shops!  Oh, the shopping extravaganza that is available throughout the coastal communities for those of us with that particular weakness—everything from boutiques to antiques—a shopaholic’s paradise.

On this particularly perfect day my husband and I started with a leisurely brunch on the San Clemente Pier and then strolled through the downtown shops for several hours; finally topping the afternoon off with some great tacos in a wonderful Mexican restaurant.

But later, as I pondered how relaxed we were and how we enjoyed our brief escape from the daily grind, I realized that it couldn’t compare to the wonder of what God has in store for us.  As wondrous as His creation is, it cannot compare to that moment when we see Him face to face in all of His glory.

 Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him. 1 Corinthians 2:9

 

Seek Him First

Barbara Kain Parker Inspirational, Personal Testimony , , , , , , , , , , ,

(This is an except from “I’m Still Standing,” a series of essays based on my journals during my encounter with breast cancer.)

Who would have thought so many would turn out to hear what this nondescript young man had to say?  What was it that stirred up so much interest—even among those who were sick and tired of hearing any discussion regarding politics or religion; or among those politically-correct individuals who sought to avoid controversy of any kind, preferring their “live and let live” philosophy that rejected any interference or judgment by others?  It certainly wasn’t his appearance.  He looked like any other 30-something guy; casually dressed in a way that didn’t make any sort of statement; and he didn’t have those movie-star-good-looks that the tabloids loved.  But there was something different about him.  Was it the humorous gleam in his eye?  Or the intriguing way he spoke in what seemed to be riddles?  Was it the way he seemed to be speaking directly to you when you were standing way in the back of a crowd?  No one seemed to be able to put a finger on it, but there was a certain charisma in his manner that divided people—they either loved him or hated him.  He was considered a dangerous terrorist who wanted to bring down the government to some, and a peace-loving pacifist to others.  So here they were—common everyday working people, stay-at-home-moms with their kids, reporters, clergy, politicians, celebrities and unknown businessmen—all gathered around and hanging on every word he spoke, just trying to figure him out.

He had a lot to say that day; touching on legal issues, personal accountability, lifestyles, and even the meaning of life.  Amazingly, the crowd remained quiet.  He was such a captivating speaker that they were literally speechless.  Then his manner seemed to change—for a moment he seemed genuinely puzzled as a new thought occurred to him.  “Why do you worry so much about things that really aren’t all that important?” he asked.  “You shouldn’t be so obsessed with your jobs, your finances, with how you’re going to afford to buy a house, with the cost of that new outfit or car or vacation, or even with where your next meal is coming from.  All you really need is faith in God because he knows what you need even before you do.  All you really have to do is look to him first and everything else in your life will fall into place.”  Oh boy—he’d done it now—if the crowd was just divided before it was polarized now.  Yet they remained quiet, almost mesmerized, as he continued speaking, with each person forming his own opinion of just who this guy was, and just how relevant were the things he had to say.

Such could be the scene should Jesus preach what has come to be known as The Sermon on the Mount in a public forum today.  And the simple truth he set down originally is as valid now as it was then, “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (Matthew 6:33-34, NIV)

It’s so simple we miss it—no matter that it’s written over and over in God’s Word—we still miss it.  “Seek him first.”  It means just what it says.  It shouldn’t be a complicated or difficult-to-understand instruction.  After all, the concept of diligently seeking after something is not foreign to us.  If we desire the love and attention of another person we go after it with everything we’ve got—romantic dinners, gifts, doing all of the little things that would please the object of our affection.  Or, if it’s a career we want, we perform and perform and perform to keep the boss happy—late hours, heavy workloads, compromised ethics—we do whatever it takes to get that bigger check or promotion.  We understand these pursuits, but when the Lord says, “Seek me first,” we don’t seem to get it.  We don’t seem to understand we need to pursue him just as we would pursue anyone or anything else that’s important to us.

And what of his admonition not to worry about tomorrow?  After all, worry is such a normal part of life.  It’s so easy to do it.  Who among us doesn’t worry about something?  Aren’t we supposed to worry about our kids, our health, or our finances?  Aren’t we supposed to worry about threatening global issues like poverty or war?

As a teenager, I remember worrying about what would happen during the Cuban Missile Crisis and, a few years later, about Viet Nam.  For my parents it was World War II and the Korean War; for my grandparents, World War I.  And today, the terrorism and doomsday scenarios are worse than ever before, even in fictional accounts.  Have you ever watched 24, or read a Clancy or Ludlum novel?

Jesus is still the solution.  His word remains true—he doesn’t make false promises, and he promised that if we seek him first all of our needs will be supplied.  Therefore, worry should have no place to rest in our lives.

So why is something that sounds so simple so difficult to implement?  I believe it’s largely because Satan knows how to manipulate us, and worry is just another face of fear.  Life is hard, and we routinely face painful and difficult situations and/or decisions.  And when fear wears this disguise it often appears legitimate—sometimes even admirable.  It appears as concern for things that are our responsibility—the financial stability of our family, the well-being of our child, or issues regarding our health.  But when worry appears, fear has done its job.  Fear has turned our attention away from the simplicity of God’s command and focused it on the “what-ifs” of life.

Part of my own struggle to overcome worry is recounted in a journal entry:   How do I re-focus and get rid of worry?  It remains just as Jesus said—I must seek him first.  And, in order to do that, I must give him ownership of all of the things that concern me.  I must ask myself, “What is the worst-case scenario, and if it happened would God still be there for me?”  Yes!  As promised in Romans 8:38-39, nothing can separate me from his love.  So, it comes back around to wanting him more than anything else—it comes back to seeking him first.

But worry is accepted—even expected—as normal behavior, and I’ve been criticized for not being logical when I’ve refused to worry about certain things.  I’ve been accused of being unrealistic, irrational, or impractical.  I’ve been told that “the world just doesn’t work that way” or that I need to “get real.”   Others have tried to put me on a guilt trip for not worrying—surely they’re more well-adjusted than me because they worry about things that are important, and I’m being irresponsible if I refuse to do it too. But the ways of God are not understood by man’s logic, so I must come back to faith—I must trust what he’s said in his Word—I must live outside of worry because my God is bigger than any problem I face—he’s bigger than the cancer, he’s bigger than the chemotherapy, he’s bigger than the radiation.

This, then, is the foundation of my faith—God is real and his Word is true.  Jesus said it—I believe it—I must always seek him first.  My life is his and he is my refuge, my place of rest, my peace, and my hope.  He meets my every need.  What more could I want?